Fran Drescher Opens Up About Her Gay Ex-Husband Sabotaging Her Love Life
Fran Drescher is embracing her single status with a refreshing level of honesty, admitting that she simply does not have the energy to manage a traditional romantic relationship. The iconic actress, now 68, recently opened up about her personal life and why she prefers her independence over the compromises required by marriage.
According to Drescher, the effort needed to sustain a partnership often outweighs the benefits, especially at this stage in her life.
“It takes a lot of work!” she told PEOPLE regarding the prospect of being in a committed relationship. She explained that she has reached a point where she is no longer willing to adjust her lifestyle to accommodate someone else’s needs. “Selfishly, I don’t want to compromise,” she admitted.
Drescher elaborated that living alone has made her more self-sufficient and less reliant on external validation. “That’s a lot of what it is when you’re with somebody…but the more you live on your own, the less you want to do that, and the less you need it if you happen to have a gay ex-husband,” she said. This unique dynamic with her ex-husband, Peter Marc Jacobson, has become the central pillar of her emotional life.
Drescher and Jacobson have a history that spans over five decades, having met when they were just 15 years old. They married in 1978 and became a Hollywood power couple, co-creating the massive hit sitcom The Nanny together. However, their marriage ended in 1999, coinciding with the conclusion of the show and Jacobson’s decision to come out publicly as gay.
Despite the initial pain of the divorce, the two managed to rebuild their relationship into a profound friendship. “I can have friends with benefits. That’s easy,” Drescher noted regarding her casual dating life with men. However, she believes her close bond with Jacobson makes it difficult for any new man to compete for her attention.
“But because I have Peter, I think he’s a bit of a c***block,” she joked. “I take him to everything, and I don’t really care. I have a gay ex-husband — live with it! But I’ve been with him since I was 15. Who can compete with that?”
She noted that their relationship has evolved significantly since their romantic days. “And over the years, he grew tremendously. He’s not the same person. Neither one of us are who we were when we were married,” she reflected. Today, they function as a unit, writing together, socializing together, and even traveling the world as a pair.
Drescher views their connection as spiritual and unbreakable. “But we are soulmates. So soulmates really can’t ever [split]…they’re like magnets, and we just had to figure out how to be happily divorced, and we so are,” she explained. She added that their lives are completely intertwined, saying, “We travel together now, and my family is his family and it’s great.”
This outlook is shaped by her spiritual philosophy, which she describes as a blend of Buddhism and her Jewish heritage. “I’m a Buddhist or a Bu-Jew, if you want to call it that,” she said. “I’m always trying to think, how can I take this experience and grow through it to be better than I was before?”
Through this lens, she has realized that marriage isn’t the only valid form of love. “So when you look at it through that portal, then it’s like… You’re not supposed to be married to everybody just because you love them, and you learn that the hard way very often,” she said. Her primary lesson has been that a partner cannot be solely responsible for one’s happiness.
“We put a lot on our mate that we don’t so much put on our friends,” she observed. By shifting her perspective, she has found a way to maintain the love she had for Jacobson without the romantic pressure. “So sometimes, that feeling that you had way back in the beginning, that got all messed up in a marriage that probably shouldn’t have been, you can kind of rekindle that if you just pare it down to much simpler expectations. And we’re good with that.”
Fran Drescher remains one of the most recognizable voices and faces in television history, largely due to her role as Fran Fine in The Nanny. The show, which aired on CBS from 1993 to 1999, earned her two Emmy Award nominations and two Golden Globe nominations. Beyond her acting, she turned her real-life divorce experience into art with the TV Land sitcom Happily Divorced, which she also co-created with Jacobson.
In recent years, Drescher has taken on a significant leadership role within the entertainment industry. She has served as the president of the Screen Actors Guild-American Federation of Television and Radio Artists (SAG-AFTRA) since 2021. Her tenure has been defined by her fiery leadership during the historic 2023 actors’ strike, where she became a global figurehead for labor rights in Hollywood.
On the big screen, Drescher has been busy with several high-profile projects. She recently joined the cast of Marty Supreme, an upcoming A24 film directed by Josh Safdie. The movie, which is set in the world of professional ping pong, stars Timothée Chalamet and Gwyneth Paltrow, marking a gritty departure from Drescher’s usual sitcom fare.
Between her union leadership and her acting resurgence, Drescher continues to prove she is a multifaceted force in the industry. She also remains a dedicated health advocate through her non-profit organization, Cancer Schmancer. As a uterine cancer survivor, she has spent decades lobbying for better healthcare legislation and early detection education.
Please let us know if you think ex-spouses can truly be platonic soulmates or if Fran’s situation is one in a million in the comments.
