Jameela Jamil, 40, Opens Up About Being ‘Sapiosexual’ and How She Really Chooses Love

Jameela Jamil has opened up about how she experiences attraction, revealing that she identifies as “sapiosexual.” The 40-year-old actor and activist explained that she has never felt instant physical attraction to someone based solely on looks. Instead, she is drawn to intelligence, humor, and personality, as she shared during an appearance on Anna Wolfe’s podcast How to Get Wet When You’re Dry.

I’m sapiosexual, so I’m attracted to anyone I find very funny and compelling and have a hormonal, like a pheromonal reaction to, Jamil said, describing how her connection to someone begins in the mind rather than with appearance.

The London-born star emphasized that she doesn’t have a particular “type” when it comes to choosing a partner. I don’t really have a type or a gender or anything that I am especially attracted to. It really is just the person. And then from there I become physically interested, she explained.

Jamil, best known for playing Tahani Al-Jamil in the NBC comedy The Good Place, said she has never understood the idea of being instantly captivated by someone’s looks. I’ve never ever seen anyone ever and been like, wow. Ever. I literally don’t even know what that is. And I would love to know what it’s like. I would love to know what it’s like to see someone and be like, ‘f**** yeah’.

Instead, her interest develops through intellectual or emotional connection. It has to be psychological or intellectual or something, she added, emphasizing that her attraction grows from conversation, humor, and personal connection rather than a visual first impression.

When asked if she has any aesthetic preferences at all, Jamil joked that she keeps it simple. I like a beard. Facial hair, she said, adding that she prefers someone who looks like a grown adult man and is clean and doesn’t smell.

Jamil has been in a long-term relationship with British singer-songwriter James Blake since 2015, showing that her approach to attraction has worked for her personally.

Her comments shed light on a less conventional view of love and attraction, reminding fans that meaningful connection can go beyond appearances. What do you think about Jameela Jamil’s perspective on attraction and dating? Share your thoughts in the comments.