Beards. Most men want them, sadly not all can grow them. Some grow patchy and an embarrassment to the word beard, while others grow in as thick as a jungle. Some are neatly manicured and others are allowed to grow naturally. And some look like they belong to a criminal while others don’t. No matter the beard, they all have one thing in common…they are unquestionably a man thing.
In the world of comics, there is no shortage of superheroes that have beards. In fact, just a quick calculation tells me that it’s impossible to calculate exactly how many superheroes have them. And that’s ok. I’m not interested in all of the superheroes that have beards. I’m only interested in the ten best and if you’ll permit me a moment, I’d like to share them with you. Here are the best superheroes with beards.
List of the best superheroes with beards:
10. Dum Dum Dugan
Ok. I already know what you’re going to say. If this is a superheroes that have beards list, why are Dum Dum Dugan and his mustache on it?
That’d be a really great question had the mustache not been arguably the best ‘stache in all of comics. The mustache is as thick as a tree trunk all the while maintaining a degree of balance and symmetry that simply doesn’t exist in facial hair. Some say that the mustache is actually a living being and if Thanos were to snap his fingers again, Dum Dum Dugan would die but his mustache would remain alive.
It’s tough to say which was better with Bishop…his beard or his mullet. I mean, look at that beautiful waterfall that flows off the back of his head. It’s simply gorgeous.
Unfortunately, because this is a superheroes that have beards list, I have no choice but to choose the beard. Understand that in no way does forcing me to choose a beard over a mullet upset me. He does have a nice beard…it’s just his mustache lacks a certain something.
Simple. The mustache that Bishop sports lacks the thickness that his beard has. Just look at it. The mustache is pencil-thin while his beard looks like he shaved the mane off a lion. I mean, c’mon artists, help the guy out a little.
8. Green Arrow
If nothing else, Green Arrow, like Tony Stark, has one of the most manicured and well-kept beards in comics. It’s tight to the face, outlines his features and lines perfectly, and more than that is as synonymous with the character as his arrows.
The problem with it…and if you don’t know it’s a goatee, is that it can possibly cause some to believe that Oliver is a pedophile and not a superhero. Get angry at me for saying it if you need to but the beard is borderline creepy. I mean, it makes him look like he’s one free candy away from spending his life behind bars.
7. Dr. Strange
Somewhat along the same lines as Green Arrow, Dr. Strange’s beard, while iconic, is also a little on the “come here little kiddies” side. I mean, the guy looks like that Uncle nobody wants to be around. Big cape. Strange jewelry. Little creepy beard. Don’t mistake my criticisms, however. Without the beard, he wouldn’t be nearly as recognizable as he is.
Now, understand that if I met the man face-to-face, there’s no way I would ever tell him any of the above. Knowing how powerful he is and what he could do to me is enough for me to shave mine the same way if he told me to do so.
6. Iron Man
Robert Downey Junior’s portrayal of Tony Stark solidified his spot as one of the best beards in comics. Rather than all the other superheroes that have beards in comics, Tony Stark opts to keep his short and fashionably in style. Yes, Tony, unlike his counterparts who grow thick and luscious beards, opts to keep his short and sweet.
You know what, though? It works really well.
If his beard was a simple goatee or perfectly manicured stubble, he’d have trouble sticking out from the crowd…so it’s neither. What makes him stand out in a crowd is that his beard is like a mullet in the sense that it’s both sophisticated and party-riffic. Out of all the superheroes that have beards, none can check off the functionality and look boxes quite like Tony’s.
The conversation will change depending on which version of Wolverine we’re talking about.
If you’re thinking that Wolverine doesn’t have a full beard and you’re talking about the classic version, you’re kind of right. He only has mutton chops. If you’re thinking of Old Man Logan and his beard, you’re right. It’s pretty badass. If you’re thinking of the Age of Apocalypse Wolverine and his beard, you’re right. That beard is too out of control to be classified as only a beard.
No matter which Wolverine we discuss, one thing remains important…he is some of the best and most outlandish facial hair in comics. And for that reason, he deserves a spot on my superheroes that have beard countdown.
4. Vandal Savage
Now we’re talking. This is a real beard. Fully formed and without patchiness, the beard that Vandal Savage carries could win the best beard award if he ever entered such a contest.
Vandal Savage has such a nice beard that beards throughout the entire comic book medium wake up each morning envious of it. Heck, even the artists who draw the other beards wished that they could grow a beard like Vandal Savage can. I don’t want to talk it up too much but when this beard walks into a room, every other beard stands up and applauds.
Most know Thor as the clean–cut Asgardian who travels from realm to realm unleashing justice on all who oppose him. That version of Thor looks as though he takes a razor to his face at least five times a day. His face is army-clean. He never has any sort of stubble. And above those, his lower face is never irritated due to the running of his helmet against his beard.
However, you must realize that Thor hasn’t always been the clean–cut schoolboy that he’s known to be. For a time, and due to speculation of an Asgardian Razor Ban, Thor opted to throw away his razor and grow his facial hair in.
And here’s why.
After numerous battles left his face scarred, he grew some facial hair to cover the scars until they healed. Sadly, they healed…
If you think that a man who spends his life in the water would be crazy to grow a big and beautiful beard, I’m with you. I will warn you that Aquaman won’t agree with either of us.
For a time, Aquaman didn’t just grow a man-sized beard in…he actually grew a beard that all men should aspire to have. It was so nice that even though it wasn’t, I actually think that it should’ve been given its own name. So, with that in mind, let’s name it Daniel. Yes, that will do. From here on out his beards name, should he ever decide to permanently keep it, is Daniel.
When you’re a literal God, you’d better have a solid beard. Hercules is a God who has a solid beard. His beard is so perfect that I’d be willing to bet that each strand of hair in it is capable of lifting just as much as his arms can.
The beard that Hercules has is the beard that anyone who wants to grow one should model themselves after. I mean, look at it. It looks like it came right off the set of a Hollywood movie.
And that’s it. The best superheroes that have beards. What do you think? Who would make your superheroes That have a beard list?